Nail Polish

As a matter of fact, I'm not really sure why girls paint their fingernails. The nail solution smells horrid, kills brain cells, and is most likely bad for the environment. That and almost the second you paint your nails, it starts chipping. You look good for a few hours, which Boy won't notice anyway, and then you have these strips of colour marring your otherwise lily-white, pure hands. It's like you're trying to look unpresentable. If ever I had a job interview, I would completely clean my nails, trim them, and make sure they were devoid of all color. It's supposed to be one of those power tactics -- clean, non-rough, warm hands are supposed to make a big impression at interviews, if only subconsciously. Ask Dad. He's the one who told me so. He said if your hands are cold or dirty before an interview, you should always go to the restroom and wash them in warm water.

Anyway, back to the issue at hand. Painting toenails is a completely different story, since I'm a big advocate of doing it. Again, I'm not really sure why. It's not like I want people to look at my feet. Feet are gross. I'm not saying this because I live with Rachel who has a serious vendetta against the Foot in general, I'm just saying that aesthetically speaking, feet are not the most pleasing to the eye. I guess having painted toenails slightly alleviates the offensive nature of the toe in general. And it gives me something to do with that extra five minutes between listening to CDs and dinner, or the break between Lord of the Rings: I and Lord of the Rings II.

I think I should market scented toenail polish that makes your feet smell like lilacs and inhibits mal-odor in every way.